Online D/s: Discipline and Punishment. Ways and Differences

On the matter of punishment of a submissive, and particularly as it relates to online D/s lifestyle this is best administered and evidenced within the confines of the technical medium available – that is, IM, email, voice(pc), video cam, digital camera.

It is accepted that punishment is administered only in concern for the sub. and her development The Dom demands only the best from her and that Dom will never punish in anger or on a whim.

Behaviour modification can be achieved through positive or negative reinforcement. That reinforcement can come in physical, mental or emotional punishments and/or rewards.

That a sub should always know what he/she is being punished for and any punishment should relate to the transgression and include a discussion of what was done, why it was wrong and how to avoid it in the future. In this way, the opportunity to learn from the experience is not lost.

Punishment will also not be overly harsh or extreme in relation to the transgression.

Punishment is the consequence of doing something that breaks a rule or set of rules which have been clearly outlined and understood.

Punishment is not only physical. Often, non-physical punishments are the most effective and are of course, most suitable for o/line discipline

Discipline is the application of sanctions and rewards to change or maintain a certain behaviour.

The following suggestions are offered for consideration:

1) Written Assignments to be submitted by email:

1. The keeping of a daily journal for a specified period of time describing pet’s thoughts and feelings about her service to You and how she may improve her service to You.
2. Being sent away for enough time to do a specified written punishment or something similar. Especially if the written assignment was on a training and discipline issue and options to correct.
3. Required publication of apology, or outline of transgression and punishment on internet/blog

2) Punishments Evidenced by Video Cam:

Most of these offer the opportunity for the submissive to reflect upon the rule and the transgression and how to avoid further transgressions.

1. Standing in a corner or in a closet.
2. Clothed or nude, made to stand quietly for a specified time period before You.
3. Holding an object against a wall with the nose (eg”ping pong ball, coin, etc)
4. Holding hands out in front of body…palms down with a heavy book balanced on the back of the hands, or holding a heavy object (eg: a dumbbell) in each hand, or coins between each finger.
5. Imposition of present Positions.
6. Attaching a leash to the collar
7. Placed in physically difficult or embarrassing positions
8. Dancing/striptease
9. Application of nipple clamps

Humiliation:

One of the most delicate practices of the BDSM community is the art form of directed, controlled, wilful and consensual humiliation. Shame is a painful emotion caused by consciousness of guilt or impropriety.

The Dominant walks a fine line of reinforcing the strong positive mental health and imagery that the submissive female needs to be happy and healthy while overtly violating or forcing this same female to experience taboo language, dress, behaviour and responses. Learning the nuances of your submissive female is crucial here.

Some punishments may include:

1. Bathroom use control over a specified time period whereby the sub requests permission to use the bathroom via im, voice or email.
2. Beg for food, drinks via im, voice or email
3. Orgasm denial
4. Speech restriction
5. Verbal Abuse/ Curse words (Whore, Slut, Worthless, etc.)
6. Forced shopping for sex toys
7. Dom selecting clothing, hairstyles that do not suit sub.